I read something yesterday that got me thinking and it made me feel better too. Another homeschooler wrote that she thought homeschool's best kept secret were the average kids. Before I considered the idea of homeschooling a few years ago, I was actually very opposed to it. I believed the stereotype that I'd heard: that homeschool children were always academically behind and very socially backward. Nevermind that two of my very best friends when I was a teenager were homeschooled and certainly didn't fit that label.
Once I decided to teach my children, and am now connecting with other homeschool families, I'm finding another stereotype/ attitude among the moms: that homeschooled children must be prodigies or you are failing. That's probably not how other moms think, but it feels that way sometimes. It seems I'm always hearing success stories of kids who are three years above grade level. I recently listened to a discussion between two moms about how well their 4 year old sons were learning to read. They both had success stories about how their boys could read books on their own. I have a 4 year old son as well, but he doesn't read at all. He loves books to an incredible degree, but he is struggling with letter recognition. I walked away feeling kind of bad and had to question myself if I was doing things right. Since I'm homeschooling, shouldn't my son be reading already? The answer of course is NO, and I know that. I also know that they weren't trying to make me feel bad and were simply discussing something of mutual interest. My son is on a very normal level with reading development and that is okay. So the comment I read yesterday made me feel better. My kids may excel in one way or other, and they may not. They will probably struggle in areas, too. The important thing is that they are learning and want to. They do not have to be prodigies. And if they grow up to be normal that is perfectly fine. Probably most important, though, is that I shouldn't be comparing my children with other children. That way of thinking is a trap, and it's made me question myself at times. Why don't my babies crawl and walk as soon as other babies? None of mine have, and I've felt bad about it at times. They all learned though! (Well Alex isn't walking yet...but he will.) It isn't a competition. My kids are individuals, not statistics, and I really need to see them as such...at all times.
Just a thought... a while back I was trying to find info on preschool homeschooling stuff. And I ran across a few comments along the lines of "let them just be kids. Don't start "school" that soon." I let out a sigh of relief and didn't worry about it anymore. :) But I've since realized that kids learn through play. (like you're awesome money game) And there's a lot of teaching that I do without realizing it. How else does Grant know almost all his colors when I've never sat down to "teach" him? I think it would be awesome to (find the time to) teach Justin to read, but I also figure that will come soon enough and he's loving all this other stuff right now that I don't worry about it.
ReplyDeleteAnyway. I don't know what my point it here. But I admire what you're doing and I think it's awesome. I think they have lots more resources now for homeschoolers, so it really can be fun and exciting for everyone!
Thank you for your comment! I totally agree with your line of thinking there. I'm actually very much a believer that children should be allowed to learn without pressure, and that the most important things for them to learn at this age are moral values. That's why I don't subscribe to the traditional ways most people homeschool even. (I will definitely be posting on that in the future.) The main reason I set aside time to have kidschool everyday right now is to get myself into the habit for when it really is necessary. Otherwise I know it would be hard for me to be as committed as I know I will need to be. So for now, everything we do in kidschool is play as far as they are concerned. I do fall into the trap of comparing my kids, though, and I feel like there are extra eyes on me because I am homeschooling. That's why that statement stood out to me so much.
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