Dear Brand New Homeschool Parent

Now that school is out for the summer, some families are considering what they want for next year.  This is for those of you who have decided to embark on the unknown.

Dear Brand New Homeschool Parent,

As you get started with homeschool you are going to hear a lot of opinions and advice from so called 'experts' and other homeschoolers.  The most important thing to remember is that YOU are the expert on your child(ren) and YOU are the one Heavenly Father sent your child(ren) to.  That entitles YOU to make decisions and receive inspiration for their education.  As one of those homeschoolers I'll gladly share what has worked for us and what I think may be helpful to you in starting. 

First of all, I think a really good first step is to ask yourself what your goals are with homeschooling.  What are your reasons and what do you hope to accomplish?  Knowing your end goal will keep you heading in the right direction when you're sorting through ideas.  The way I approach our school time is a result from asking myself this question.  My personal goals in homeschooling are in this order:

1. Raise children who have testimonies of the Gospel and live it.
2. Raise children who have strong family relationships.
3. Raise children who know how to work.
4. Raise children who love learning.

You'll notice that my LAST goal addresses academics and it isn't to see my kids get good grades or become math wizards.  I was always a good student as far as grades went, but never loved learning until I was in college and consequently never learned much until then.  So when we get to the academic part I focus on keeping it inspired for all of us.  I want them to love it from the start.

These goals manage how I approach each day.  First of all, we have a family devotional.  If nothing else gets done, that should in my mind.  If we are not getting along, being kind, etc. that is addressed before we move into our academic time, and we will stop those activities to readdress family relationships as needed.  I also place snuggle time higher on my priority list than academics.  When life gets hectic and we haven't been feeling very harmonious, we will have snuggle days instead of school days.  Work gets placed before academics as needed.   Mostly the kids have regular chores that they do after school time each day, but I would rather see them learn to work hard than spell correctly so it comes first as needed especially when we have family work projects.  This is a glimpse of how I prioritize that list.  It keeps us on track.

Second, I think creating a simple schedule is the next most helpful thing.  Set aside a few hours at the same time each day that you are going to give your child(ren) your undivided attention.  Then choose a few things to work on each day.  Keep it VERY simple.  This year our schedule was:

-Family Devotional
-Learning to Read time (as long as their attention spans held out)
-Math time (no set time, just a simple lesson)
-Learning Activity time (this was whatever I felt like each day and usually just one: a craft, science experiment, penpal letters, cooking together, etc.)
-Read Out Loud time (again no set time, but this is when I would read out loud to the kids)

When we first started homeschooling we only had family devotional, a learning activity, and read out loud time.  It was enough to get us started and once I was comfortable with it, it was easy to add in things.  Next year our schedule will be very similar to this year except we won't have learning to read time anymore because my oldest two are now fluent readers and the next two aren't old enough yet.

Here I'll point out that you don't have to do everything the public school does.  You don't have to have all the subjects and busywork that they have.  You have the advantage of working one on one with your child(ren) and going at their speed and their attention span.  Most worksheets are just busy work and a waste of time.  If they aren't really learning from something, it isn't worth forcing them to do it.

Third, once you have goals and a simple schedule, focus on keeping it inspiring.  If they're giving a lot of push back they probably aren't learning much.  If you're hating it, there is something that can change.  Intelligence comes from God as the scriptures say and as such brings happiness.  There is a certain amount of pressure that is right for each kid, so I'm not saying don't apply pressure.  I am saying keep it at the right level.  Learn about things they are interested in.  Learn about things you are interested in because your enthusiasm will be contagious.  Be willing to go slower than the world says is necessary if that is what really works.  Be willing to skip assignments that really won't be beneficial or jump around in the textbook (if you're using a textbook...we aren't).    Don't turn school into a checklist, and it will be much more enjoyable and they'll learn so much more. 

Again, remember that you are the expert on your child.  One of the hardest things about homeschooling is worrying if your child is measuring up and if you're doing enough.  However, the world really has no idea what your child needs and it's important to tell yourself that all the time.  Ignore the pressures around you so you can receive the inspiration that is sure to come.  When we started homeschooling, I had no idea what to teach, but I knew what my goals were and we were sticking to our simple schedule.  I was diligent with giving the kids that much of my undivided attention and that was what opened the way for inspiration.  I simply knew when it was time to add things in and when the kids were ready for new things because the Lord was helping me.  It continues to be that way. 

Fourth, be choosy about curriculum and possibly wait to buy any.  It can be very expensive and then if it doesn't fit your style and their needs, it can be a frustrating waste of money.  Every homeschooler I know has stories of jumping around between curriculums.  Right now, I only use curriculum for math, and I waited until just a few months ago to purchase it when I was sure I knew what I wanted.  I'm so glad I waited because I would have ended up with something totally unsuited to my kids' needs and my teaching style.  As for other subject areas I'm finding we can learn without curriculum.  I taught the kids to reading by simply sounding things out phonetically, and they are learning to write through penpal letters, art projects, and games.  They are learning spelling and grammar through reading.  We learn science and history by choosing library books on those topics that interest us.  I wrote a blog post on this very thing recently:

http://1-2-3-school.blogspot.com/2013/03/doing-it-without-curriculum.html

If you're interested in looking at our math curriculum, I'm happy to recommend it.  I did find it difficult to teach math without a curriculum, not because I don't understand math, but because there are so many different concepts that I didn't know what I was missing without some guidance.  My curriculum is very different than most because it isn't organized by grade level.  Rather there are only four books that teach all the way to pre-algebra.  One book is on money and decimals, another on geometry, another on fractions, and another on operations (addition, subtraction, etc.).   I love it because once my kids understand a concept they can move right onto the next without having to wade through hundreds of problems on the same thing.  On the inverse, if a concept is difficult they can spend as much time on it as they need to while still progressing in the other areas.  My kids aren't at just one grade level for math; Logan is way ahead for operations, possibly behind in geometry, and probably right at grade level for the other concepts.  I love that he can work on things as he understands them without worrying about if he's getting it all done.  You can look at it online here:

http://www.mathonthelevel.com/

Last, if anything I've said here has resonated with you, I HIGHLY recommend reading A Thomas Jefferson Education by Oliver DeMille.  (I get nothing from recommended this; I just think it's worthwhile.)  We stumbled on this when Logan was preschool age and it completely changed the way I looked at homeschool.  It was a LIFESAVER because it showed me how we could homeschool without the battles a lot of homeschool parents have.  It's not a homeschool how-to book, but rather a method that helps parents see how they can do this in a more natural way than forced task managing.  It also seeks to help parents give their children the kind of quality education our founding fathers had, hence the title.  It is the reason I have so much fun doing school with my kids and why I think they've been able to learn in such leaps and bounds.  I consider myself lucky because I think I have a much easier and enjoyable time schooling my children than just about anybody I know.  It's a really short easy read and is available at some libraries.  It's inexpensive to purchase online as well.

Also, here are the links to a couple of other blog posts I wrote that may be helpful.  The first is another I wrote specifically to anyone who was thinking about homeschooling for the first time; I said some of the same things, but mostly it's different.  The second is just a description of what a typical day looked like for us last fall.

http://1-2-3-school.blogspot.com/2013/01/tackling-fears-and-dispelling-myths.html

http://1-2-3-school.blogspot.com/2012/09/what-day-looks-like.html

Sincerely,
A Homeschool Mom Who Loves It

 

 

Our New Normal

I think I'm getting the hang of our 'new normal'.  It's definitely a lot busier than our 'old normal'.  I knew that was the calm before the storm, though.  Things were way too easy for a few months there.  This 'new normal' means doing school while nursing a baby and getting everything else done when she's asleep.  School is about the only thing I can do when she's awake right now because she doesn't like to be put down yet (imagine that!).  She also likes to nurse constantly when she's awake, more than any of my other babies.  Come to think of it, she also likes to be held and talked to more as well.  So we do our family work while she naps and when she wakes up we sit down to read and learn.  The funny thing is that she seems to like school time too.  She's never more content (during waking hours) than when I'm reading out loud.

 

I was pretty pleased with this week.  For the first time in several weeks we had an almost full school week: four out of five days!  That fifth day was awesome, too, because we went to the circus instead.  :)

The Baby is the Lesson

In some ways I feel like I've been slacking with school this month.  I felt terrible for the first two weeks because I was so big and pregnant, so school time was getting shorter and shorter.  Then we've been adjusting to our first two weeks with a newborn, so again school time hasn't been complete.  (I also felt terrible with an infection.)  So I am grateful for the wisdom of women who have been here before me. 

 

At the beginning of my pregnancy, there was a discussion on my TJED MUSE group (see top right link) about homeschooling while pregnant/ with a newborn.  Several women who have older children chimed in to point out that it's okay to slow down the pace during this time.  One said that 'the baby is the lesson', and it stuck with me and comforted me these several months.  It's true.  My kids have benefitted from the lesson this baby has already been to us.  While I was pregnant they helped extra with the housework and helping me in general because I wasn't feeling good.  Contributing to our family in that way was good for them even if it meant our school lessons weren't as regular during certain parts of my pregnancy.  Now that the baby is here they are helping with her.  They have spent a lot of time holding her, and are still helping me in extra ways because I need to spend so much time nursing and holding her.

 

We've been averaging school time about every other day these two weeks, which I think is pretty good considering everything.

 

This picture is from the first few days after the baby and I came home.  We actually had a full school day!  The kids were writing letters here.  (Actually, Annie was illustrating her already finished letter.) 

Alex was playing at the other side of the table.

When we were hoping to conceive another child, I thought it would be really helpful if Logan learned to read by the end of my pregnancy.  I never thought that both Logan and Annie would learn to read!  It has been incredibly helpful.  This is mostly what these two do during the main part of the day.  Logan is reading the encyclopedia in this picture.  Hehe...

Annie has been diligently plowing through book after book after book.  She's not fast yet, but she's fairly steady. 

Here is our littlest, but most important lesson right now.  We love our little Abigail!

My Reward

Today we had a full, normal school day.  Those have been less regularly lately with how I've been feeling (plus some extra stress), so it was a big effort.  Mostly we've been having partial school days the last two or three weeks.  It was great, but my reward afterwards was even better.

I always ask the kids to straighten the house before they can play outside and today was no different.  They are good little workers, and sometimes even cheerful about it.  I admit that is not always the case, though.  Usually they just get it over with.  I'm grateful for that alone. 

Anyway, today we started with a load of laundry (I'm on top of laundry again!!!!) that needed to be put away.  My reward first began when Annie saw me bring the basket upstairs.  "Mom can I help you put away the laundry?"  (Um...yes...)

The boys joined in without being asked, and before I knew it they were running around pretending to be laundry fairies.  (This is a common game they play.)  They were actually trying to sneak the laundry away from me and put it away before I could catch them.  It was hilarious.  I think it took us all of five minutes to put away that load.

Then I asked the kids to straighten the house.  I expected them to just get it over with (without complaint since we were having a good day), but instead they decided they were house fairies and turned it into a game.  Not only did they do it at amazing speed and very thoroughly, but they were running through the house saying things like, "We love to work!  We love to clean!  What else can we do?"  I think it took another five minutes for them to straighten the whole house.  I almost wished I had more for them to do.  :) 

They also provided plenty of amusement with this.  I was informed that we have a 'make a mess fairy' (AKA Alex) who they have trained to make messes just so they will always have work to do.  (That sounds pretty accurate.)  Further, they have the ability to become invisible and while invisible fly around the house doing the work.  I LOVE it when they are cheerful workers. 

Something I have learned about these kids is that they are happier when they work.  I think that's true for all people.  So the fact that they cheerfully did their chores after working hard at school for a few hours is no coincidence; I'd say it was a side effect.

Playing Hookie

This is what we did on Friday instead of school:

Here are my justifications:

1. The weather finally warmed up.
2. These kids have been cooped up with a cranky pregnant Momma for way too long.
3. Odds are we won't be getting to the park with a newborn for at least a couple of weeks.

And, yes, I felt like superwoman for actually getting to the park.

Maintaining Freedom

We're reading a wonderful book right now during our family evening time.  It's called "Carry On, Mr. Bowditch" and is another true story about an amazing man during the founding years of our country.  I highly recommend it to young and old. 

It's really an interesting story about Nathaniel Bowditch's life, and there was one part that really stuck out to me the other evening.  It's the only political argument we've read thus far (I think...considering it's not really a political book), but was so good I wanted to share it.

Nat (Nathaniel) was appalled that a newspaper reporter was speaking against the President (who was George Washington at the time). 

"No!  I don't want to hear it!"  Nat said.  "And I don't think editors have any right to talk against the President.  Americans ought to stand together!"

Behind Nat someone chuckled.  Nat turned.  Dr. Bentley was looking at him with a twinkle.  "Is this a political argument?"

Nat shrugged.  "No argument at all.  Ben's got an article there that talks against the President.  I said I didn't want to hear it.  I said that sort of thing ought to be stopped."

To Nat's amazement, Dr. Bentley shook his head.  "No, Nat.  We can't have freedom- unless we have freedom."

Nat stiffened.  "Does that mean the right to tell lies?"

Dr. Bentley smiled.  "It means the right to have our own opinions.  Human problems aren't like mathematics, Nat.  Every problem doesn't have just one answer; sometimes you get several answers- and you don't know which is the right one."

Nat felt his face get hot.  "But people don't have a right to talk against the President, do they?  That's going too far!"

"Years ago," Dr. Bentley said, "before we won our independence, the Essex Almanac published something about freedom of the press.  It was true then; it's just as true now.  I may not have the exact words, but it went something like this:

"The Press is dangerous in a despotic government, but in a free country it is very useful, so long as it is free; for it is very important that people should be told everything that concerns them.  If we argue against any branch of liberty, just because sometimes people abuse that liberty, then we argue against liberty itself.  In a free country, the press must be free."

"Well, Nat?" Dr. Bentley said.

"I never thought of it that way," Nat admitted, "but I guess that's the way it has to be; 'we can't have freedom unless we have freedom.'  And that means freedom to speak our minds."

Dr. Bentley nodded soberly.  "Remember that, always."

I added the emphasis to what stood out in my mind the most.  Much of our press is no longer free because it is controlled by politicians and men with lots of money, and that is dangerous.  It greatly controls the minds of the masses.  Thankfully, it isn't completely controlled, so we do still have access to a variety of opinions, and have the ability to seek out the truth.  It's becoming increasingly difficult though. 

I think this also applies to just about anything that is attempted to be controlled by law.  People will ever abuse liberties; that's part of being free.  We are on earth to use our agency, or ability to choose.  By choosing we grow and learn.  That's the point.  Inevitably someone will abuse their freedoms.  Does that mean that all things should be controlled?  No!  The more restrictive laws become, the less free a country becomes.  Maintaining freedom is extremely important, even if it means that some citizens will choose to abuse those freedoms. 

I agree with Dr. Bentley here, we should remember this always.

My Sanity Break

...happens now. 

This is very much an element to our family's homeschool.  I'm not sure I could survive without it.  The kids know this time as 'quiet time'.  We've been having it since Logan was born, except then it was called 'nap time'.  In any case, it's a consistent afternoon break that allows me to re-charge for the evening.  Having my kids around all day is fabulous, but it's easy to get overloaded with all that energy and noise (not to mention the many things they need me for).  There are countless wonderful things about homeschooling, but I imagine this is one of the more prevalent trials among other homeschooling mothers.  As the older ones have quit taking daily naps, I've maintained this time with a few rules. 

1. Leave mom alone. 
2. If you are on the main floor of the house you must be reading or napping. 
3. If you want to talk or play you need to be outside or in the basement. 

During this time I'm able to study, read, relax, rest, and work on my projects (blogging falls into this category).  It's a wonderful time.  I can calm my brain, my body, and my stress levels.  The kids have had my attention all day up to this point, so they are content to give me this time.  For us this lasts about 2-3 hours every day.  It also works out that they get a break as well.  On days they are tired, they will choose to read or nap.  On days that they've been feeling cooped up, they run around and get their energy out.  Lately this time has been a huge blessing because I've often needed an afternoon nap; they are so great about letting me rest!  I know of other homeschooling families that have required this time even as they've had teenagers, and I can totally see that happening for us.  Hooray for this little element!