Trust The Process

This is a phrase that I keep hearing in the TJEd world, and I've come to use it myself.  So much of the time I worry that I'm not doing enough, and sometimes I stress about the way the world around me measures the progress of a child.  I do school very differently than the public schools and even than other homeschoolers!  Then I have to remind myself that I have different goals than the world around me, than the school system, and even other parents.  Then I trust the process (the TJEd process that its) and relax.   

I was thinking about this last night and also thinking about how my kids 'measure up'.  I know the latter doesn't matter, but somehow it makes me feel better at times.  Of course, it also makes me feel worse at times.

In any case I was marveling at Logan.  He's my oldest and the only one who is officially 'school age'.  He's the one I feel pressured about right now.  Yet we don't spend hours a day doing academic work.  We spent maybe 15 min. a day on the same kind of work other kids his age are doing at school, but without pressure or requirement.  Then we play or work or get curious together, and HE'S LEARNING!  Wow!  It's so true that if you leave a child to himself, provide the right environment, and be there for him when he wants to learn that he will!

This kid is starting to read just like other kids his age.  He's picking up books on his own and sounding out the words.  It's still somewhat laborious, but he gets faster every day.  I'm only working with him on it for 10-15 minutes a day, and lately it hasn't been every day.  He writes on his own willingly when it comes time to respond to a penpal letter, and he walks around sounding out words in his head and trying to spell them.  It always cracks me up when he sounds out abbreviations phonetically, "Mom, what does abf mean?"  He can count as high as he wants to go without getting stuck and we've NEVER tried to teach him numbers.  He's occasionally asked questions about how to count and we've answered him.  He can add small numbers without ever having looked at a math book or a worksheet.  He can cut, glue, and color in the lines (when he wants to), as well, but I don't care.  He was bound to figure that out.  As for Kindergarten skills, he's right on target.  Thinking about that made me feel a little better, but in the same thought I recognized that it wasn't what mattered.  My goal is not skills, it's knowledge!  Skills usually accompany knowledge, but knowledge doesn't always accompany skills.

Then I started thinking about other ways my boy uses his brain.  He's discovered that our encyclopedias are a source of information.  He actually tells me that he 'needs some information' before heading to that shelf.  Then he finds the book that has the same first letter sound as the word he wants to look up and brings it to me.  I'll find the reference for him, and then he wants me to read it to him!  These aren't children's encyclopedias, by the way.  I read, he questions, and if I'm not feeling too lazy, we often delve into the subject using our other encyclopedias and other available tools.

Something else he does is pick out books from the non-fiction section of the library.  He knows more about space, dinosaurs, volcanoes, and submarines than I do.  The memory of a child is amazing!   He's taken an interest lately in the presidential race because Jim talks about it so much, and he has a candidate he would vote for if he could!  He also tells others to vote for that candidate.  He was very excited to go with us to the caucus recently. 

He's been working on a project recently in our basement.  We bought a small kitchen appliance from Goodwill (I think I've mentioned this) for him to take apart.  He took it apart in minutes.  Then several weeks later, having forgotten how the several gears in it were placed, he put it back together by himself.  He's getting pretty handy with a screwdriver and I wouldn't exactly call his knowledge of mechanics typical for a five year old.

Those thoughts are what really made me relax and trust the process.  So far, I feel like know I'm doing what he needs (because a mom has a right to know), and so far it hasn't been difficult at all.  In fact, I'm confident it's been a lot easier than getting up and rushing out the door every morning, and then coercing him to finish his worksheets in the evenings after long tiring days at school.  I'm certain he's learning as much, if not more too.  

P.S. I looked down just now, and discovered that he's trying to read a medical book.  It doesn't even have pictures!