A Tribute to My In-Laws

I guess I'm really on a roll here.  I've really had the itch to write, and I can't rest until I record my thoughts anymore.  :)

My post last night resulted in turning my thoughts to my in-laws and just how much Jim is like his parents.  As one looking at him, rather than as I've been looking at myself, it seems almost easier sometimes to see how much he has been shaped by his upbringing.

I was so grateful when I met Jim that he had certain priorities that I also had.  For example I had determined that I didn't want a tv, which is almost unheard of.  So on our first date, I was amazed and impressed to discover that he felt as I did!  (Again, I'm saying nothing against having a tv; I've written about this before if anyone wants to hear about this decision of ours.)  He also had goals relating to education and debt which were joyous to my ears.  That first date really was impressive...for both of us.

Anyway, when we started seriously dating, I had the opportunity to start learning about his life and his family.  I started seeing that these priorities came from his parents.  They've felt very strongly about certain things in life, and have been able to do some wonderful things as a result.  One thing is that they paid off their home in a short time frame because they felt it was so important to stay out of debt.  Jim had a firm conviction that this was a great plan, and desired that for his future family.  I was thrilled!  (And can't wait until we get to that point.)  He also had valuable insight, thanks to his parents, that helped me understand how this was possible.  I desired it, but really didn't know how to do it.

Their desire to be out of debt led them to prepare themselves in other ways.  This was a visible thing when Jim and I got married, and it encouraged me to begin my own preparation.  I'd always wanted to do it, but it was daunting because it was the unknown.  Jim's mom helped me with my first canning experiences; she even took me to the cannery when we started our food storage.  It was the step up I needed to feel like I could do it.

Another thing Jim carried into adulthood was a love of learning.  I've explained before that I gained this in college.  Jim has always had it though!  He's a very serious, meditative thinker.  He LOVES to think on hard topics and he REALLY thinks.  His dad started teaching him Algebra (much to the frustration of his teacher at school) when he was in second grade.  Jim has always said that this was so much fun to learn with his dad.  He used to go to college classes with his dad when he was a little boy, and came away knowing that education was important and exciting.  Jim's favorite topics are science, mathematics, politics, and economics.  Those are his dad's favorite topics too (as far as I can tell).  I have no doubt the apple didn't fall far from the tree here.  Thankfully, because of this, Jim has brought my knowledge a long way in these areas.  (I wasn't even slightly interested in politics or economics before marrying him!)  He's been able to bless our family with an important and appropriate concern for our nation.  I can tell Jim really looks up to his dad's knowledge because he has always sought him out to discuss these topics, or when he's wanted to understand something.

When Jim and I were dating, it was he who brought up the idea of homeschooling.  His parents had the courage (it really is daunting) to pull him out of school when he was halfway through 4th grade because they could see that he wasn't having the experience he needed.  He was homeschooled from then on.  I know I would have never considered homeschooling if it weren't for Jim, and he probably wouldn't have considered it if his parents hadn't.  Doing this with my own children has been one of the best experiences of my life!

I was grateful for the high standards Jim had when we met, and I came to learn that he carried these standards from his parents.  They taught him very clearly what was and wasn't appropriate between boys and girls, what was and wasn't appropriate in the media, and so on.  Because I wanted to make the best choices with all my heart, high standards were very important to me.  It was important to me that my husband love the Savior, love the scriptures, and honor the Priesthood.  His parents taught him the Gospel, and encouraged him to serve a mission when he was old enough.  After his mission he lived with his grandparents who encouraged him to live the Gospel.  His desire to do what was right was strong when I met him, and that was his most attractive feature.  It still is.

I am married to a man who cares about people.  In fact, he cares so much that it hinders him sometimes because he is so heartbroken when he is disappointed.  He anxiously desires to lift others and see them make the choices that bring happiness, especially his family.  His mom in particular is very much this way.  She would make huge sacrifices if it meant she could save one of her loved ones heartache or assist them in some way.  She has done so many things for us in the time we've been married.  She's loaned so many items, helped us when we couldn't afford clothing for our kids, babysat for long periods of time, showed up at our apartment in the wee hours of the morning when it was time for one of our babies to be born, helped us with physical work, and many others.  She refuses to give up on someone she loves.  This is the way I see Jim reflect his mom the most.  They both have such a strong love.

Maybe I've been thinking about our families so much because we're getting ready to visit them.  We are looking forward to that visit so much.  In fact, it's my greatest excitement right now.